Righteous Indignation

So, my husband and I decided to rent the movie, “Bombshells,” this afternoon and my response to it came as quite a surprise…

I found myself enraged. These women, although put in an awkward position, nonetheless were free to make a choice: they all chose to have sex in order to get ahead, get famous, get a tv show, etc. I found I had little sympathy for these adult women and their choices.

When I was a 17 year old child in my father’s house the night he raped me, I didn’t have any choice. I couldn’t get anything of benefit out of my sexual torture but a mental illness, dissociation, and to subject my husband and daughter to a lot of grief in the future when at 42 I decided to get my life back for all three of our benefits.

I didn’t get the luxuries of my own tv show, fame, fortune, money or then later, the opportunity to file a lawsuit and benefit socially and financially again in the public domain. No, for my troubles I got bipolar disorder, ten suicide attempts, 30+ hospital stays, generalized anxiety disorder, and on top of it all, I have subjected the two people I adore most on earth (my husband and daughter) to endless suffering due to my mental and emotional struggles.

Life isn’t fair. This statement is a cliche because it basically rings true for us all. I am writing today because I am angry! I deserved better when I was a child and my family deserves better today! I deserve better today and instead I have to be in intensive outpatient therapy to finally (and hopefully swiftly) put this incest childhood behind me once and for all!

This is the first time I have ever been in touch with what I am labeling my “righteous indignation” at the way my father treated me when I was too young to expect better treatment and when I deserved better treatment! I want, more than I have ever wanted anything, to heal from his bad choices so that I can love my family the way they deserve to be loved and so that the three of us can enjoy our beautiful life together and move forward in a destiny that doesn’t include me carrying the pain and anger I currently have!

Stay tuned! My intensive therapy sessions are now down to once a week and I will be reporting back here on Tuesday afternoon after the next session which is dedicated to me dealing with the rape my father perpetrated on me.

Sign up to enter to win a set of signed copies of the four books I’m currently promoting here:

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And as always, continue reading more from me here:

https://www.Amazon.com/author/mariekjohnston (Biography & Bibliography), https://www.MarieKJohnston.com (Fiction & Folk Art), https://www.BooksbyMarieKJohnston.com (Extended Biography & Bibliography), https://www.Pinterest.com/kmmccurry (120 Lifestyle Boards)!

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